It’s without question that this past year has been one of the hardest years I’ve gone through in a very long time. I won’t go into as much detail as some people would like me to (ya nosey), but I am going to state the big things I am extremely thankful for. I learned a lot about myself. I had to shatter myself to rebuild what I have now, almost destroying everything and everyone around me. It’s without a doubt, that I appreciate everything I’m about to list.
God
Around this time last year, I had been so lost. I’d seen some of the darkest days of my adult life, where I was questioning my existence and whether it was worth it to keep pushing. I doubted every glimmer of hope that I’d seen before and felt like I was right back at square one: age 16, depressed, lost, and misguided. It took a lot of strength to reach out to an amazing (online!) community of women who were struggling through similar issues, and prayed for each other. In the midst of it all, I found my way back, and he’s continuously shown me that my hard work and effort was worth it.
My husband
It’s been a rough journey for my husband, and I commend him for all of his efforts in supporting me through whatever travesty I was experiencing. It’s uncommon to find someone who will put up with the rollercoasters of life nowadays, and we were really pushed to the limits this past year. We almost lost our way from each other, but we managed to come back stronger than we’ve ever been. It was long conversations of what we wanted to work towards, and how we needed to work together if we were going to come out of it alive. I really have been blessed with an amazing partner in life.
My fur babes, Okami and Okiharu
I’ve already written so much on how Okami has really been a rock for me. When they say that dogs are a (wo)man’s best friend, they weren’t lying. Okami has always shown me love, no matter what is going on in my life. Oki has brought a new energy to our home that’s really livened it up. His personality is the complete opposite of Okami, in which he really enjoys playing with us. No matter how long we’re gone, or if we lose our cool, they always greet us with excitement. Most loyal pets I know. Except when Ami decides she wants to try and bolt, then it’s a different story.
Our Families
It’s been really hard moving to yet another place without our family close by. We’re very thankful for Facebook and Skype to connect us to our families in Asia and Europe during the holidays and during this pregnancy. As we grow into our own cluster of a family, it’s nice to have the love from each of our parents and siblings. We miss everyone and we can’t wait to see everyone once our bundle of joy appears! Then our 2020 family adventure to Asia is going to be in the works to see extended family, <3
& Finally, my Baby Boi
You are my light. You are everything to me. They say that having a child doesn’t “fix” things, and it doesn’t, but once I knew I had you in my life, I had another someone to live for. I love that every day I can feel you grow and get stronger, waiting to come into this world with both fists up ready to take anything on. I can’t wait to see what kind of boy you grow into, and I can’t wait to hold your hand through it all. I love you so much, baby boi. So, so, so, so much.