It’s not unusual to think that you need to be in combat to be diagnosed with something like PTSD. Being brought up in the military community and entering the force myself, it was common to think that PTSD = Combat. End of story. You can’t be hurt because you’ve never seen war. You can’t be hurt because you’ve never seen someone die. You can’t be hurt because you’re doing so well.
Today, a lot of people opened up about feeling ashamed at first for seeking help. They felt as if they didn’t deserve it. I was in this boat for the longest time, and I think that’s something that I opened up about recently. For the last 17 years, I felt like I didn’t deserve help. I was always told that “things happen for a reason.” Pushing my trauma aside like it was meant to happen to make me who I am today. It’s so far from the truth though. Anything that caused you trauma, anything that you relive over and over that hurts you, that’s valid. You woke up today, you’re human, you deserve help. That’s it. Point blank.
You being you means you deserve help, no matter what your story is. It took me a really long time to finally seek help and pretty much demand getting help from the Army for all the shit it’s caused me to relive. It hurts me to know that so many other people are feeling ashamed just like me for seeking help just because we compare our trauma to other’s trauma. Especially those who have experienced combat trauma. “We don’t deserve help, they deserve help.” No man. You deserve help because you need help.
Today was that gentle reminder that I’m really not alone in what I’m going through. It’s sad that it takes a group of broken people to feel like you’re capable of healing. We’ll all heal together.